I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
