I feel like death. Did you die last night?
Nope. Ready for round 2. Fiesta!
unreal. Greatest comeback since Jesus
You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Randomize
