the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Randomize
