I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
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It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
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Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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