So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
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