Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Randomize
