Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
