She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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