that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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