I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
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