He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I think I sprained my soul last night
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
