Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize