so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
Randomize
