how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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