CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize