About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
