And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Randomize