My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.