I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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