Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
