I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
then he tried to convert me to islam
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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