So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
All I do lately is eat steak, drink warm beer, watch porn, and avoid booty calls when I'm too lazy to take a shower. I think the apocalypse turned me into a dude.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
Randomize