You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm