bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize