I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Like your dick isn't Beyoncé, it doesn't get close ups
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Randomize
