Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
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