you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
my secret santa just gave me a pregency test
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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