And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
Randomize
