I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Unless you watched your mom's very literal rendition of "I touch myself" while she was wearing a bikini, your vacation wasn't as bad as mine.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
There's always time for handjobs
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Randomize
