Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
Randomize
