I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
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