So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
i dont even know how to be here
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
