You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Randomize