I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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