Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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