your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
