My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
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He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
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I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
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