Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
There's always time for handjobs
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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