he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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