nut hugger
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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