i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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