Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Randomize
