I think I can smell my own vagina right now
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
You've changed since you got that strap on
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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