Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
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not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
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Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night