just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
You smell like a Billy Joel song
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
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