I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
they need to just BURY HIM!
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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