the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
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I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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