I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
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