they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
high people should be assigned attendants
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
