having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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