I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
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